I am about to start my detoxification from the opiates that I have been on for the last 9 months. The Acupuncture is a wonderful thing that is helping a lot. I have been on Dilaudid now for 2 months because of the Oxycodone shortage. The drawback to this opiate is that it only lasts about 3 hours and then I begin all of the withdrawl symptoms. Just think of a junkie on the street and that is what I begin to go through. Shakes, paranoia, anxiety,tremors, sweats etc. I now have a new medicine that helps with the withdrawls which is a blessing but it tends to affect my cordination a bit and it also chills me out quite a bit because of the anti anxiety med that I take along with it. So...... let me sum this up because it helps me by sharing what I am going through.
MEDICINES: 2 mg Dilaudid 5 times per day for pain and because my body is addicted to it.
1 mg Xanax 4 times per day for anxiety.
60 mg Cymbalta for my depression. Once per day
.1 mg Clonidine for withdrawl symptoms and to lower my blood pressure 3x daily.
50-100 mg Trazodone to get the sleep that I need. I don't have restful sleeps.
10 herb pills twice a day to help mellow me out.
WHO I AM SEEING: Brad Whisnant, certified Acupuncturist/herbalist. Provides good "JuJu"
Shelly La France who is a nurse practitioner. Medicine prescriber.
Kurt Swensen, Certified addiction specialist. Counselor for my depression,anxiety and my PTSD.
Each day for the time being I am in pain, depressed, have high anxiety, suffer paranoia, have difficulty falling or staying asleep, irritability, hyper vigilance and feeling jumpy and easily startled. I feel like I have let myself down by still being on the opiates, gaining weight and not being where I want to be physically. I stepped down today from my marathon coaching job but I will continue with the program as an assistant coach and head of the route committee. So as you can see by reading this I am not in too good of a place in my life right now. I can see that I will have some major challenges ahead of me and know that with really hard work I will be able to overcome them. I just wish that I could see the light at the end of the tunnel.
बल श्रद्धा आशा
Strength Faith Hope
